I hate the hospital smell on my mother’s face but I kiss her anyway. She’s tired. My mother has been battling cancer and because of her chemotherapy it knocked her liver and kidneys to the mat. It didn’t knock them out, their not down for the count but their taking time to stand on their own two. My mother is a soldier. I watch the machine as if I know whats going on but I don’t. Those Grey’s Anatomy episodes did nothing to increase my medical knowledge. I’m trying not to get on the nurses nerves but I want to know the answer to the question that we all ask when we are in the hospital with a loved one, “How is she doing? Is she getting better?.” All praises are due to the Creator that the answers have been “Yes, but its going to take time.” You never apprecitate things fully until they are gone or on the brink of being taken away. I’m not saying my mother is on the brink our Creator only knows that but each moment that I get to spend with her is truly a blessing. Some may ask, “Why would you be sharing such a private moment with the world?” Well, we were all put here to be of benefit to others. We werent created to just exist. The purspose of this blog is to inspire you to be appreciative to the people and circumstances that the Creator has allowed you to experience. I’m the oldest of my mother’s children and believe me I’ve never experienced a greater pain but if through this experience one of you can show a greater appreciation to the Creator, your parents and everyone else then it was worth it.
It started when I was 6 or 7 years old seeing my mother experience the pain of poverty had an impact on my psyche. It was motivaton for me to go after my goals with ambition and tenacity. Gun shots didn’t move me but the tears of my mother caused this fire to grow deep in my belly and it only grew with time and pain. The pains of watching my mother deal with all the trials that come with poverty turned this spark into raging flames. These raging flames burned away all doubts and fears of failure. I always wanted to show my mother appreciation through material because she never had it. That motivated me to do all that I could to give my mother the house, car, and money that she deserved because I wanted to show her I appreciated her.
Now with my mother lying in this hospital bed I couldn’t help but to feel this immense amount of sorrow because I felt that I had not shown her the appreciation that she deserved. I felt that I had not followed through on the promises that I had made as a child. I felt that I failed. As I allowed these thoughts to plague my mind and bring my spirit to a place that it was never intended to go my mother asked for some water. I quickly jumped up and fulfilled her request. As she sipped the cool water with a look on her face as if she had walked the Sahara desert twice both of our spirits were then fulfilled. Why? Well obviously for her because she had drunk the water but for me the Creator showed me that what better way can I show appreciation then to take care of my mother during her weakest moments. During my weakest moments as an infant she took care of me by feeding and cleaning me. She was there for me everytime that I called or cried depending on your perspective. My whole life I believed that buying her a ton of things would show her that I loved and appreciated her. Making sure that she never had the stress of bills ever again was always my priority. (and still is) But as I sit with my mother at her bedside I finally realize that the greatest way to show my mother and for you to show your mother how much you love her is by always being there for her when she needs you. You don’t have to have millions of dollars, homes, and cars because the love that you show your mother is absolutely priceless. If you show your mother love that is the greatest form of appreciation. Please keep my mother and all mothers in your prayers.